Is "Open to Anything" Holding You Back?

"I don't necessarily know what to focus on."

"I feel like I have a lot of opportunities open right now where I can zigzag to different places. So that's why I'm struggling... I don't know where I'm going."

"I'm looking for a job in sustainability and I'm open to anything."

It sounds like you're being flexible and pragmatic, casting a wide net in a tough market. After all, you can only get hired for jobs that exist already, right?

When someone tells me they're "open to anything," what I actually wonder about is if you've lost your sense of agency. Looking for a job is hard on the ego. People are literally judging you -- but that's just their job and there's nothing you can do about that.

But it's important to feel like you are in the driver's seat of your career:

Interviewing without focus and agency is like interviewing in your bathrobe.

Consider this: The reason why this job is open is because the person interviewing you doesn't want to do it. It's not their bag -- they don't want to be thinking those thoughts. But what they do want is confidence that YOU will do a better job than they will. So how do you convince the interviewer?

• You've already thought about the job and how you'll execute.
• You show up with hypotheses and ideas in hand, not as a blank sheet.
• At the very least, you're in data gathering mode to validate your perception of the job.

"From the job posting, it seems like the top priority for this position is X. Do I have that right?" "If success is X, I think I would need to know Y and Z. What should I know about those now?"

Excitement is contagious. So is being bummed out!

Feeling a bit unmoored is totally understandable. Don't lead with it, though.

Hopefully, you have friends, family, and maybe a therapist to help you manage the stress of job searching. When you're interviewing -- whether it's an actual job interview or an informational -- your goal is to have shared focus with that person on something interesting to you.

As an interviewee, it's your job to bring the interesting thing. And that takes preparation. Try this:

Make a list of 3 things you could imagine being happy doing. Pick 3 projects you've done where you thought, "I want to do this 5 more times." Then go looking for how you could do that. Don't worry about whether that job is out there right now. Flip the script -- instead of scanning job boards trying to squeeze yourself into openings, start from what excites you.

Then, for each thing on your list, spend about two weeks pretending that's your sole focus. During those two weeks, do 3 informationals, and walk in with something like this:

"I'm exploring the idea of A. My hypothesis is the world will look like B in C years, so I want to be doing D. From where you sit, where do you see this going? If you were me, what would you do next to get on this path?"

See how it feels to say it out loud. Pay attention to how people respond. After two weeks, move on to the next thing on your list.

By the end of six weeks, you'll have done 9 informationals that actually gave you information -- not the vague "so, tell me about your journey" kind, but real, specific, useful information about a path you're genuinely considering. And you'll know which one lit you up.

Every conversation is like a box of Cracker Jacks: There's a prize inside.

Learn to recognize traction.

• When you learn that you really don't have an appetite to do a job that you're clearly capable of doing, that's actually a win! What is it that turns you off? Figure it out so you can avoid that entire class of jobs. Using your life force to apply for a job that you don't want is self-sabotage.
• When a random conversation gets you really curious about something, that's signal! Ask why is that exciting? Where can you get more of that?

When I was starting out in my career, a very senior person in the industry told me, "you're not going to be happy in this industry with those expectations." At the time, I thought "well, I'll show you!" and you know what, she was totally right -- not that I was unhappy, but that I had to let go of the expectations I walked in with.

I didn't recognize it at the time, but it was probably one of the most impactful conversations I had in early career!

Practice being in control.

Funny thing is that you can just decide to be in control. Obviously, you can't control everything, but you can control a lot -- how you spend your time, for example.

You don't need to find your forever path. You need a next path. And "next" is a much smaller decision than "forever."

By figuring out how to focus and setting short-term goals, you're giving yourself the freedom of taking agency. You're enabling the people who are already going to love you to find you. There are people out there already wandering around thinking, "I need exactly this person." They just don't know it's YOU yet -- when you meet them, make sure you're ready to show them clearly what you're all about.